Recap...

It has been a while so I thought I ought to log in and catch you up on what this girl has been up to. First a bit of a recap....

My RL life took a turn for the weird this year... and for stress relief I have found myself in SL
more of late. Now here's the thing: I have been role playing in SL for a while. First it was Firefly sims with "D", then Startrek sims with my friend Mandy. And if you've been keeping up you know I began playing in Gor this year.

The whole Gor thing started as an accident. Sort of. my first few weeks in SL I fell in love--they call it the SL effect--had a torrid affair in SL. Three years worth. When he dumped me, I was broken. Then I thought maybe we could be friends, and for a while we were. Sort of. Back just before he told me to go away, he was building in Gor and roleplaying there. I admit my first interest in Gor was hoping to bump into him. Maybe. See if he was there. But he never was. Sadly, I will always mourn the loss of his friendship. I still think of him; I suspect I will for the rest of my life. But life goes on. This summer I decided to try the Gor thing in earnest.

I began my SL career seven years ago as a "courtesan." In Firefly I played a "licensed companion." In Star Trek an Orion Slave Girl (it's not easy being green!). I like flirting and men with intelligence. Men who can hold a conversation. Men with imagination, and a sense of humor. (I also blame D for spoiling me there. He set the bar rather high!)  What being in Gor has taught me is that in my heart of hearts, I am a submissive. I like playing the role of "slave." It also taught me that I am very very picky about "Masters."

I tried being a city slave girl in a couple of Gorean sims. Not so much fun.  Most of the time the men are busy running around raiding or being raided, the free women are hiding in the basements when they are not belittling the slaves, and the slaves keep scrubbing the floors waiting for the fireworks to end so they can go back to pouring wine. No one talks to or flirts with slaves. It is all "come here slut/beast and do X."

In July I took one man's collar. That turned out badly. While collared to that Master I met a Jarl who told me he would claim me someday. I've been chatting with him off and on in IM since (and I like the conversations), but I haven't seen him since day one although he is online every time I log in. How long does a girl wait to be claimed? In the Gor Hub I met another Master who was interesting and we talked about the philosophy of being a slave/sub in RL. But he wants a slave in RL as well as SL, has a bunch of girls who fly across the country to be with him for days at a time in RL. Nice guy, but I am NOT into that.

So now I am between Masters. Hanging out in the Gor Hub. Hoping for... Hmmm... I don't know what I am hoping for....

Here a Master... There a Master....

I logged into SL today, intending it to only be brief, and saw my Master was in the Gor Hub. So I joined him. He was standing with a pretty brunette who was wearing a skirt and no top. I went to his left side (so as not to interfere with his sword hand) and knelt at his heel. He petted my hair and said good morning. I wondered if he was talking to the brunette, but never had a chance to ask because he said he needed to TP somewhere and I should wait, he'd be right back.

As the brunette was still standing there, I asked her if she knew Master. I figured she was a new slave of his (or maybe an old one, being as I've only been his for 3 days so far--who knows how many women he has tucked away). I think I offended the girl because I thought she was a slave--but hell she was naked from the waist up! Certainly didn't look like a free woman. Anyway she huffed out to finish her RP with Master and I hung out in Gor Hub to wait. (Well, okay, I was working on other stuff while hanging out, but I figured I should stay--since he told me to--where he left me. See! I am trying to be a good slave!)

After a few minutes I get an IM from him saying I was not to talk to Free Women in IM. I'm like seriously? I addressed her in IC in Open Chat first. She got huffy on me! So next I get a lecture on how I don't own him he owns me.  His words: "understand one thing and this matters most above all... as my slave.... your one goal is to please..... it matters not if i take in another.. or if i make a woman my mate... your focus is on the one who owns you"  

Dude! I was so not jealous. Tell me what the game is and I will play along. Or dismiss me and I will find something else to do. But you expect women to sit around and wait for you? Meh.


And then he tells me there will be beatings until I scream if I screw up again. Oh goodie. I get to stand around the Gor Hub and wait for him, then I get called slut, whore, and cumbag. I have yet to do any serving for him (and I'm a damn good cook, dancer, pleasure slave--the man does not know what he is missing!). 


I stayed in TGH and waited. I mean, he is the Master and he told me to wait until he got back. I had a lovely chat about what it means to be a slave vs. a sub with a very nice Sir who said he'd love to drag me into the woods and ravish me but he respected other men's property. I respect that! He also told me my Master was an idiot that didn't know what a treasure he had. So while waiting for my Master (who never came back), I had more fun than I had had yet with my Master. Something is wrong with this picture.

Yesterday Hot Hunk Master, and today Cool Conversation Master.

And now I am thinking to myself: why am I still here with my Master?  To be honest, I have no emotional investment in this Master. I want to RP. He said he did, too. We had one sort of "fun" RP (he captured me, then he "broke" me) on the day we met. But not much since. I'm not so thrilled about hanging out in the Gor Hub all the time--which is pretty much all he does because he has no Home. Not sure what his end game is, but I wonder if have made a serious mistake taking his collar.

Maybe he'll collar the brunette and then I won't feel bad about running away. 

Another (HOT) Gorean Man

Today I went to MysticHope to get a new outfit. My friend Noir had picked this one up the other day and I wanted one for myself. So there I am looking for the outfit to try it on when I find the cuffs and anklets I bought the other day. They came with a chastity belt. I tried on the belt and Poof! My skirt disappears. And just at that point when I am standing there half-naked, this gorgeous hunk of a Master walks up and asks me a question. Yup. Not my finest moment. So I scramble back into my skirt and talk to him.

He was looking for the Freebie chairs. See Kira Lavendel makes some awesome outfits and until yesterday she had several in lucky chairs in the store. But she's redoing the place right now, and so she took them down. While we are discussing the chairs, up comes this 'princess' (seriously, that was in her name! I mean, who does that!) all in pink silks and tattoos. My first thought is shit--he has a first girl. (All the good ones do.) But I guess she was just asking the same question because, much to my relief, she wandered off again. She was far too Barbie for this guy anyway.

The Master who was looking for the chairs, flirted with me, and me--being the bad girl and lousy slave that I am--flirted back. (I know, I'm supposed to be loyal to my new Master, but honestly, it has been only three days and minimal contact and it's not like it was all love at first rape with him!) Besides, this new guy was hot. All bulging thews and naked chest.... He was fun to tease. And he teased back. Points for him!

Sidebar: There are a lot of men out there who get all BTB and chest-thumpy when a slave addresses them directly, doing a whole: "You, beast/slut/whore, kneel before my Masterly might" routine, which--to me--defeats the whole purpose of role play. How the hell am I going to get spanked if I don't mouth off and give you the opportunity for "discipline"? 

It was refreshing to have a man tangle his hands in my hair and want to touch my "perky breasts" and still exchange witty repartee without belittling the girl. It was even more refreshing that he respected that I was already collared. (Dammit.)

Here's the thing. A girl likes to know she is beautiful. Be told she is desirable. Wants conversation, because, Hell, this is a virtual world. All we really have is conversation. You can tell me all you want that you are touching my thingy with your thingy, but if you haven't reached my mind--my imagination--you haven't touched me.

Master Hotstuff made me smile, and made me feel all tingly in all the right places. He touched me.

He also told me he would one day collar me. Take me. And the way he said it made me blush in RL as well as in SL! And then, he took a picture of me in the new outfit (into which I finally fumbled my ass). He titled it "Randy's soon to be bond, Tsai Jie."

Seriously hot. (The claim, I mean.)

He sailed off leaving me with a parting admonition to write to him every day (also hot). And I think I just might do that. For now, I'll just sit here a while and enjoy not wiping the smile off my face.

The Girl is Back!

Yes. I'm back. After a long hiatus, through which although I never really recovered from the broken heart I have learned to live with it. And for the record I have decided it is time to pick up the pieces and move on. So here I am. Back where I started. Blogging about SL, sex, and my life as a virtual girl.

My latest SL exploits include a stint in Gorean sims, where this girl is discovering her inner submissive. No. Really. Oh c'mon, stop laughing. Yes, I know I am a control freak in RL. Obsessive about so many things. But I am looking at this as a lesson in giving up control. In humility. (Are you picturing Vannessa Redgrave saying "uuuu-mil-leee-tay!" to Lancelot in Camelot? Good. Me, too.)

Seriously though, This girl has allowed herself to be collared by one Darious Whitefeather. Nice guy. A bit rough around the edges. But he has potential. (Now picture Mulan and the "I'll Make a Man Out of You") Okay. So maybe I will have to work harder on that humility.  Sigh.

Anyway, stay tuned.

She's baaaack!