Marry him, Sophira!

I was cleaning out my computer folders this morning and found this screenshot I took of the map in SL exactly one month ago. It feels so far away now. You see I was in-world moving my stuff out of Valis. It was the end of my home there. The end of everything Draven and I built together. The end of his love. The end of my world.

You can see my blue "home" location in the top left of the picture. You can see the yellow dot that is me standing there. That was the day I went in to take all my things out and leave the place to Draven. He had told me to "delete" his stuff and keep the place. Told me he was leaving Valis, maybe leaving SL, leaving me. I am still not entirely clear in my head where it all went wrong. We both had real lives that had to come first. But, oh, it was good--for 2 years it was so good. This last year, I don't know. It just all went wrong.

Valis was the first place in SL I could call home. I bought the land for Draven, for his birthday in 2007. Added to it so we could build on it. He used to yell at me for buying more and more land. I wanted more for more prims for him to build with. I so loved watching him build, seeing the gorgeous things he could create. He made me an Italian villa, and a gazebo full of stars, we had waterfalls and airships, boats and beautiful gardens on the land and in the sky.  We talked about someday owning a whole sim . . . I would have given him a continent if I could have.  But he was never comfortable with my gifts, I don't know why. I don't think he every understood that those were just things. The had no real value, the only value in the gifts is just to show someone how much you care about them. And I cared. Loved him. I still do, god help me.

So it was ironic to me that as I was dismantling my life in Valis with Draven--perhaps the most painful thing I have ever had to do--there on the map was this sim, Minacci, just to the south, covered in a marriage proposal. I think that might well be the sweetest thing I have ever seen.

Someone--someone very much in love with Sophira--wants to build a life with her. And he took a whole sim to spell out his love for her in letters of a dozen prims each. On a multi-prim platform in the sky.

I say marry him Sophira. Tell him you love him every single day. If you can't live with him in RL then live with him and love him in SL. Love every moment with him as if it is the last.

Hold onto him, Sophira, and don't ever let go.

Memories...

I have spent the last few days... well, the last week or so really, ever since Valis disappeared, collecting all my memories of it. I have always been a SL shutterbug. Problem is I have photos scattered across at least 4 computers/laptops (and let's not talk about the many flash and portable hard drives). The thing is SL is just so damn pretty. And in SL we are so damn pretty. And there are all those magic moments.

It is hard to not get caught up in the magic of Second Life, in the "SL effect"--that sense that the things that happen in the virtual world are sometimes more real than your real world. It is true, it can be dangerous and even painful to expect too much from a virtual world. To believe in the game. But here's the thing: in SL we are real people, too. I don't want to think of SL as a distraction from my real world--I like my RL. I think of SL as a beautiful addition to my life. Enrichment. I have met more people that I would never have had the chance to meet. I have learned how beautiful it can be to love someone in SL. I refuse point blank to believe that love is ever a bad thing. Or that happiness, however fleeting, is bad either. I refuse to think that time spent with another person, caring about, getting to know that person, intimately: mind, body, and soul--no matter what ever happens in the long run--I refuse to think that kind of connection is ever a mistake.

So I have been gathering my memories, of Valis, and of Firefly before it. Of Draven. Of Heron and Wren, Hawk, Mal. Of Dabrin, and of Jinara, Jhai, and Noir. Of everyone who came, and so briefly lived, and loved someone at Valis. I am gathering all my pictures--all my memories. And putting them up in Flickr.

Right here... where I can look and remember. And never regret a single moment.

Tuesday Afternoon

Tuesday, afternoon,

I'm just beginning to see,

Now I'm on my way,

It doesn't matter to me,

Chasing the clouds away.

Something, calls to me,

The trees are drawing me near,

I've got to find out why

Those gentle voices I hear

Explain it all with a sigh.

Tuesday afternoon is my new favorite time of the week. So many men, so little time. . . .

Dancing in Valis

Dancing in Valis
Originally uploaded by Tsai Jie

Ever meet one of those men in whose arms you could just melt? It is even better if you are dancing with a special friend in the sky in Valis.

Tsai watches a sunset and drinks her tea

Tsai has a cup of tea
Originally uploaded by Tsai Jie

So it is coming on Friday evening. I'm sitting here in Valis wondering what to do with myself. There is always Trivia Night at Callahan's Crosstime Saloon. Or maybe there's a dance happening at the Firefly Bar in Blackburne--there I could at least hang and listen to stories about Lillybell's latest escapades.

Or I can sit here and drink my cup of chai tea and watch the sun go down behind the grotto and the birches. Yeah. That's what I'll do. Sometimes you just gotta appreciate what is in front of you.

With Wings

with wings on the patio
Originally uploaded by Tsai Jie

Just had to show you what dancing looks like with wings on the Serendipity Seekers patio!