A Second Life. . . or why am I here?

You are asking yourself what is this woman talking about? A second life? It's true . . . but to really understand my second life, you need to experience Second Life.

I admit it, I am addicted. I'd like to blame Bobby and Amanda who first mentioned it. Or Rhiannon who got me to watch over her shoulder, but the truth is I am a sucker for a good storyline and the beauty of SL is that you can write your own story. It is role playing. It is the holodeck and the replicator (that's Trekker speak) all rolled into one. It is another reality and it is escapism.

So because it was almost summer and I had the time, I joined. Two years ago today. Next I needed money. Gotta buy clothes (don't want to look a total noob) and bling  from the designers and the scripters (because SL is also capitalism at its finest). The money here is called "Lindens," and one US real dollar is worth around 250L. So for about the price of a cup of Starbucks coffee I can have 1000 Lindens to play with in the Second Life world(s). Not bad. You don't have to really eat, or mow the grass, or do the dishes (unless you want to--just about anything can be put into gestures, a string of actions that your character or avatar can do). This includes virtual sex.  Best of all though is the dancing. Alone on a club floor, in the arms of a handsome avatar, even all by yourself in the moonlight. 

And then there is SL sex. Think about it.  No bugs to catch. You can say YES. Maybe get money for saying yes, maybe get presents, maybe just do it because you want to connect to a special someone. And you can say NO. And no one can force you. Don't like the guy who is coming on to you? Mute button. He follows you around? Delete him from of your friends list and he can't see you. Corners you? TP (teleport) out. Harrasses you? Report him to the PTB. All in all that adds up to the potential for a lot of fun, and no foul.

Beware, though, SL is addicting. Don't let SL occupy you so much that you forget that you have a Real Life (tm) too. And don't mix them or there is a big broken heart potential. Don't share RL info in SL with anyone you do not know VERY well. Don't be surprised when (if you share SL info with them) RL friends think you need therapy.

A good thing to keep in mind is that this is role playing. Your avatar (your SL body) is both you and not you. You can look anyway you want. In fact, most of the avatars look like gorgeous sexy 20 somethings. Never assume that how the avatar looks is the same as how the person looks in RL! Many of us do try to stick somewhat close to our ideal RL selves. I am, for instance, really an RL blonde, but in RL my eyes are more grey than green or blue. Some of us choose to be another gender, or another creature. I can be a smoke demon. Or a lust demon. In SL we can have any face and hair and body and clothes we want (or can afford). We can have wings, fur, feathers, elf ears, vampire teeth, horns, scales, or tails. I know of one fellow who lives most of his SL life as a Cheetah. I've met another who was a robot. And there is no way to tell what anyone's real age is. All of this is NP (no problem) if we don't lose control, if we don't forget which life is which.

Gothic Fashonista!

At the end of a long hard week there is nothing like a shopping spree to lighten a girl's mood . . . Well, okay, maybe multiple orgasms are better (or dark chocolate--especially if it is smeared on a tasty man--which, of course, can lead to the MOs), but serious shopping is the next best thing. So when I heard about the new clothing line a certain tasty man has been building I just had to go buy a new dress.

When I saw it I knew I needed two! One in each color. The dress, by Bird of Prey, is called "Choir"--all slinky black with a gorgeous Celtic cross in scarlet or ivory on the mandarin-collared bodice, on panels of the prim skirt, and on the gauntlet-cuffed gloves. I'm wearing it here with my thigh-high black boots by DE Designs, and the Mata Hari bracelet by Random Calliope. The hair is "Amber" by Callico Creations, in both sunkissed and golden versions of blonde. You can find Bird of Prey shops in the vendor areas of Blue Noise and Bloodforge dance clubs.

Now all I need is a TP to the nearest "Best in Gothic" contest . . . So who wants to take me dancing?

Angels and Demons at Blue Noise Hideaway

Last night was an "Angels and Demons" event at Blue Noise Hideaway in Waterton, so I dug out my favorite Seraphim wings from Material Squirrel and put my dancing shoes on (my favorite Diamond Stilettos from Awori Cassini) and headed on down. My angel outfit top and thong are the FaeSilks Ice Princess from Suki's Silks, but the with that top skirt was lace and I just didn't like the look of it, so I wore the white Harem Skirt, also by Suki, which fastened nicely to my thong with its bit of gold jewelry. My jewelry is the Ode in Amber series from Random Calliope's most recent butterfly hunt--a gift I got from a special man who went collecting the jewelry laden butterflies on Valentine's Day. I was pretty pleased at the mix and match angel outfit, especially since my fur cuffs gave off fairy lights and my halo (a freebie I picked up ages ago) and shoes had lots of bling! I was the brightest angel in the bunch! Here's my angelic boys from another angle, that's Jerzy on the left and Porkie on the right, and there's Katie, MicahJohn, Cutiepie, and Zach in the background. Another fun evening for everyone at the Blue Noise!

Men in Tight Pants

So I never ever thought I would admit this (and it is all the fault of three of the men in my life) but I think I am beginning to (gasp!) really like watching professional football! Now I know you are shaking your head and saying to yourself: "Girl, where is your head at?" But seriously. . . I watched (and even enjoyed) the playoff games yesterday. No shit. Of course being a good Midwestern girl I was rooting for my home state team, the Green Bay Packers, and what I discovered is that as a sport, football has several things going for the serious observer.

First of all, there is bling involved! Really! Apparently when these guys win and go to the Superbowl they get sparklies! There's a special ring made just for the occasion! But even more important than bling is the fact that football teams are made up of men. Twenty-two of them at a time, if you count both sides. And I mean BIG men. There is just nothing that can make a girl feel all warm and snuggly as a big strong man with whom to cuddle. But it gets better. All those men are wearing some of the skin-tightest pants you have ever seen! And, girls, those are some fine male tight-ends out there!

Here for instance is my personal "fave," Brett Favre.

Now is that hot or what? Unfortunately my boys lost the game yesterday. (Oh, Brett, you broke my heart!)

So now I have to chose between rooting for the Giants or the Patriots at Superbowl time. And it all boils down to this: Eli Manning?

or Tom Brady?

Help me out here, Ladies. Which of these backsides would you pick to cheer for? (Or play with?)

A Lazy Happy Birthday

Today is my Birthday! I was born in the year of the Dragon, the month of Capricorn. That makes me assertive and outspoken, obsessively organized, with the desire to always be in control. Having both earth and water in my signs I also have a deep desire to give pleasure to others. . . . (Hmmm. That may explain my Second Life in a nutshell!)

So what makes for an ideal birthday for me? I'd like to lounge around, maybe reading a good book (the Kamasutra? the Tao of Love & Sex?), or maybe cuddling with a lover. Later tonight maybe some dancing and flirting at Blue Noise or Lotus Moon, my two favorite clubs. Speaking of lovers, the red pavillion above was a gift from a lover, as was the lovely jewelry from the Isle of Mists in the picture below.

Here are some fun facts I just recently discovered. I was born on a Sunday (do you know the children's rhyme about days of the week?) which means I am both happy and very social (duh!). I was born in the Egyptian month of Famenoth, the third month of the season of Poret (the Emergence month of the Fertile Soil season). On the day I was born the moon was waxing gibbous or almost but not quite full--easily seen in the daytime and shining brightly at night (much like me). My ruling planet is Saturn (the only planet with rings. . . Yeah! Bling!)

For a whole bunch of fun facts about your own birthday check Paul Sadowski's Birthday Calculator! And, hey! . . . if you happen to be in-world tonight, look me up for a birthday kiss!

T'is the Season to Shop 'Till you Drop

It is true, we are a consumer culture. Face it, we spend millions on bling here in the USA around this time of the year and billions more on marketing that bling. According to an article on CNN.com/technology, "In the first two weeks of November alone, the company that created Second Life says there were almost 3 million digital objects sold on its site, though it's not possible to tell which of those were given as gifts." Second Life itself is nothing if not the ultimate expression of our very consumer culture. After all there is nowhere you can go in SL that you don't run into a mall or atleast some advertising. But is there anything wrong with giving your virtual boyfriend or girlfriend, your whole virtual family of friends a little something at this time of year?

Cynics say virtual gifts have no meaning. No substance. You can't really wear or use or touch them. the same CNN article also tells us: "Others call virtual gifts a waste of money -- a way of "pouring millions down the virtual drain," says Michael Bugeja, the director of Iowa State University's journalism school. He's been a vocal critic of the resources universities and students are dedicating to virtual worlds. This holiday season, he's challenging people to give money they planned to spend on virtual gifts to charity instead."

The response to that perspective is: "'It's easy to get caught up in thinking that it's not real because it's digital. But we have plenty of digital items that have value,' says Jeska Dzwigalski, who works in community and product development for Linden Lab, the creators of Second Life. 'Have you ever bought a song on iTunes? Have you ever paid for software?'"

The whole argument--is it okay? is it a waste of time? a waste of money?--seems rather spurious to me. We are trained from childhood to think of giving gifts to others at certain times of the year. Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays. If you don't send gifts on those occasions, you get labeled as a scrooge or a curmudgeon. But think about this: how often have you gotten a gift that is totally useless and sits in a drawer or a closet until you finally ship it off to Goodwill or sell it on eBay or just throw it in the trash? (My RL mother is addicted to Home Shopping Network and infomercials--I have 3 Eurosealers I will never use in a kitchen closet right now.) Isn't it far better to get an inexpensive virtual item for your virtual life that you will actually use instead of a useless item for your real life for which you are supposed to be appropriately grateful?

Here's my take on it. Say I get a fancy dress or toy or household item in SL from a friend or an admirer. Say it costs L700 (we are talking Lindens here, virtual money, so the equivalent in US dollars is $2.94). For less than the price of a large cappuchino my friend has given me hours of pleasure. Unlike a cup of coffee, I can use this virtual item again and again, and each time I wear it I will think of the friend who gave it to me. I'd say that is really what the giving of gifts is all about--the thought put into picking something of value to the person you wish to gift, the connection made, and the fond memories that are evoked every time that gift is used.

But there is an even larger upside to the virtual gift. No waste! The box or package you wrap it in does not end up in a landfill. You have not spent or wasted huge amounts of real cash. And the best part is you aren't broke or paying off huge credit card debt come January. And here's another thought: some of the money you save by buying small inexpensive gifts inworld rather than pricey useless RL ones can be spent on good causes. Bugeja has part of it right, we all should think of giving to charities. And, although we should be doing it more often than just at the holidays, this is the right time to get that last minute tax break, too.

So here is my plan for this holiday season: shop inworld for your friends and family who play in virtual games. Encourage them to shop inworld in SL for you, too. Give smaller gifts to those who are not inworld, but make it gift cards or cash so they can get something they really want. Then take a chunk of the money you've saved and give it to charity. My list for holiday giving includes: Public Broadcasting, the Sierra Club, UNICEF, the Girl Scouts, the World Wildlife Fund, and National Public Radio. Maybe I'll also finally clean out those closets and get all that stuff I don't need to Goodwill, too.

Isle of Mists: Where Everyday is Sweetest Day

I discovered a beautiful sim yesterday, a place called the Isle of Mists (Isle of Mists: 97, 119, 23).This entire sim is devoted to lovers, soulmates; and it was created by a lovely lady named Ashira, who also designs some of the most gorgeous jewelry. You can cuddle with your sweetie under an ancient oak, or follow a path to a royal pavilion for a bit of private attention, or meditate amidst butterflies and hummingbirds in a jeweled garden, watch a unicorn drink from a magic pool at the base of a waterfall, or lounge in a hammock in the sky and watch the sunrise in the arms of your beloved.

Aside from the beautiful gardens and the fantastic creatures (don't forget to visit the Unicorn Pool, or Serenity Falls), you have to see the lovely treehouses. One is Ashira's home and the other is her shop where you can buy her very unique "Soulmate" scripted jewelry.

The Soulmate pieces are not only lovely designs, but when set to your beloved partner's presence, they respond by sending out poofs of hearts and love notes. There are wedding ring sets (of course), lockets, and you can even give your beloved the key to your heart. The jewelry will tell you when your lover is near, and the lockets can carry pictures of you and your beloved and even play your special song. Here's a pic of me wearing a soulmate locket. Beautiful isn't it?

So visit Ashira's Isle of Mists. Take your sweetheart. You know Sweetest Day should be everyday, when you are in love. . . .

Tsai's life goes off on a Tangent

I am not even sure where I was when I met him. It has been only a week or so, and it feels like centuries. Time in SL messes you up like that. I was on a quest for the perfect pair of sexy shoes. You know all strappy and sparkly. And when I walked out of the store, there he was. Standing in the middle of the street, looking all dark and broody. Black hair in a ponytail, long wisps of it falling in his face. Dark glasses, black jacket. The kind of man your mother tells you to stay away from. A dark bird of prey. Dangerous. Desirable.

I wanted to try out my newest sexy walk so I strutted past him. Let him see my ass. That usually does the trick. I was expecting a wolf howl, or a raunchy comment. Was thinking, why don’t I get clients who look like that? Then he stopped me. Of all the unexpected things he could say, he asked the origins of my name. I told him that I’d tell him about mine if he’d tell me about his. We went to Mystic’s Club. (I highly recommend Slow Dance 4!) We danced. I have been dancing ever since.

There is something about this mystery man. He is an enigma—even for SL. Scary desires. The hands of an artist. The silver-tongue of a poet. "Verbal foreplay" he calls it and he is not wrong. Let me tell you, the give and take of teasing and flirting, the fencing with innuendo, and the right balance of sexy talk and promise—this is a fine art. Here’s the thing guys, most women know that the art of lovemaking lies not just in the look, but also in the words. You can be the hunkiest of hunks and if your dialogue is consistently "hey, I wanna f*** you!" you will not be getting flocks of hot women rushing to lie down for you.

It is easy for women to pick up most men. Men love to hear us talk sexy. But rare is the man who can keep us on our toes. Who can keep up his half of the dialogue, and mean it. I have met scores of men in SL... only a handful were truly good at SL flirting. One hot geek, one sexy Brit, and this man, my mystery lover.

Don’t know where this is going, don’t know how long it will last. Don’t care. I’ll fly this bird as long as he will return. No jesses, no hood. And if the talons he has hooked into my heart are occasionally scary—well, life is not...love is not... for sissies.