Thursday, July 17, 2008

Trying to Listen to What the Universe is Saying

Do you ever wonder if the universe is trying to tell you something?

Seems like lately my secondlife is taking a back seat to everyone else's real lives. All right I hear you saying that it has been a holiday season and all. And maybe it is just because the RL holiday was incredibly painful this year (and no, I am not going into that!). But just now when I have the time finally to play in SL, no one else does! What is up with that?

Jinara is off somewhere (no doubt pouting over another man now that Hawk has gone MIA--not seen since November), and most everyone else in the family seems to be MIA, too. Jhai keeps complaining that she is way behind on her RL work and so can only come on briefly. Japh got his heartbroken by Wren, then chased Jinara around a bit but said she felt too much like his baby sister, and I haven't seen him since before way before Christmas. Ash and Wulf (new members of our SL family, also new to SL) only have eyes for each other. Heron flashes past now and again, but is always on her way to go camping or shopping. Haven't seen Dabrin, Mal, or Wren in ages! And then there is Draven. Of late even Draven hasn't had much time to play in SL, since he is incredibly busy with RL.

As people come and go in SL I remember those who haven't see ages. I miss long evenings exploring, walks on the beach in Purfect Droom, dancing in Blue Noise or Lotus Moon, cuddling in Valis.

Purfect Droom is gone now. Blue Noise is empty. Under new management since Rhiannon ran off with that Australian DJ Neo. Katieh, the new manager, hasn't done much more than rebuild, no grand reopening yet and when I stop by the place is deader than dead.

I used to go dancing, used to flirt, tease, I was the party girl. When I look back over nearly 2 years that I have been in SL I see that I have gone from being the bad girl to being a very domestic stay at home girl.

So why is it that when my friends are not around, the universe keeps throwing other opportunities in my face? Suddenly I have been hearing from men I used to keep company with. Don't get me wrong, no one has thrown themselves into my lap and begged for my attention. They just pop up and say "Hi." People on my friends list that I haven't seen in ages.

Like my old boss from Lotus Moon. The one who was always trying to talk us girls into the back room for a quickie where his wife couldn't see. And "blacktrenchcoatman" (names will be changed to protect the guilty) who always came into BN and wanted to tickle or lick me [Note to my male readers: saying "lick" or "tickle" is not the equivilent of saying hello!] And Mr.Mystic who offers to teach you the secrets of the enlightenment--in his bed. And good old Mr.Wrong, who although he is better than he was since he got a regular girlfriend, still starts most conversations by asking for a blow job. And let us not forget the guy who made an avatar just for me so we could (Ha! He wished!) have sex without him "cheating" on his SL partner.

Why just now when I am feeling lonely are all these guys turning up again?

And here's the thing. I don't know whether or not to be insulted that the universe is putting men in my path I don't even want. Do the Powers That Be think I am so easy? Or do they think I have no taste? Or are they protecting me by sending men I won't be tempted by? It is not that I don't have men in my life that I can't hang with and have fun. I love talking literature with Jamesen, or going to art shows and clubs with Corwyn. But as much as I care about both of them, they are not my family like Jinara and Mal, Dabrin and Jhai, Heron and Hawk, Wren, and Draven.

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