Extra-Marital Sex is Condemned by Conservatives? Well, Duh!

I stumbled across this in the FORA playlist (something every thinking person should know about), and while the oppression of active sexuality by the conservative right is not going to come as news to most of you, this video clip is well worth watching. You go Dagmar!

Of showers and other realities

In the shower just a few minutes ago I couldn't help but think of you. I imagined you stepping in behind me. Running your hands over my wet body. As soap and water ran down my spine I imagined it was your fingers tracing that damp curve, trailing down to my wettest spot. I imagined you pulling me close, imagined curving my body to yours as you slipped inside me. The pounding of the water on me, on us. The way you pound into me, my breasts pressed against the cold tiles, your hands on my hips as you ride me. We'd orgasm together in a rush of heat and steam and then you would just hold me, spent and shuddering as the water cooled.

Miles and miles away from me, you are heading off to your busy day. I am, too. I will think of you all day long and wish for you a productive day, so that when you get home tonight you can let all that other world go. Just be with me. In our private garden, in our second life.

Courtesan's Sex Tip of the Month: Getting it Wet

Nothing makes the end of the day more special than the thought of a hot bubble bath come the evening. And what better than a bath with your man? "Taking a bath à deux can be incredibly seductive," says Cosmo Magazine. "Just lathering up each other with bare hands is sensual and exciting. . . . So next time you're having a sexy suds-fest with your man, have him lie back, resting his head on the edge of the tub. Facing him, kneel over one of his legs (his thigh should be sandwiched between your thighs), and lower yourself onto him. When he's inside you, wrap your ankles around his calf so you're fully entwined. Then lean forward and hold on to the edge of the tub behind his head to support yourself as you glide back and forth over his body, rather than up and down. The zero gravity of the water gives you a wider range of motion than you'd usually have and lets you experience new sensations every time you alter your movements.

'This position creates a slower buildup, which can ultimately lead to an exciting climax,' says Susan Crain Bakos, author of The Sex Bible: The Complete Guide to Sexual Love. Don't worry about taking too long; you'll have plenty of time to enjoy it. 'Your man is getting less friction than he's used to, so it can delay his orgasm,' she adds."

Translating those moves into your second life is not as difficult as you might think. I know what you will say--a good sex-bathtub is hard to find. You can find sex-animated hot tubs in several shops in SL, and sex animations for showers are everywhere (though the best are still at Strokerz). The problem is that animated bathtubs seem to be a rarer animal. I found one at Neptune's Kiss which took a bit of negotiating. The pose balls slip underwater and you find yourself sitting on the edge of the tub rather than the balls. That is corrected by sliding your camera under the water to "see" and sit on the balls rather than on the edge of the tub, as I found myself doing over and over until I got the hang of it.

But remember, the best part of SL is the dialogue. Pick up any sex or even just a cuddle animation and slip it into your basic tub. Then you and your partner talk through the action. Describe your soapy hands sliding over his skin. Tell him in graphic detail what you want him to do to you, what you want to do to him, and how it feels. Let your imagination run wild, since the best part of sex in SL is that there is no discomfort! (No banging your knees on the side of the tub, no worrying about fitting into cramped tiny spaces, no face full of water when you "go down" on him. . . . ) As in all SL sex, the key is that the more specific and descriptive you make your language of lovemaking, the better the visualization becomes and the more intense the orgasm will be. So get out there, girls, and get wet! And then don't forget to take those Cosmo tips home to your RL lovers, too!

Gothic Fashonista!

At the end of a long hard week there is nothing like a shopping spree to lighten a girl's mood . . . Well, okay, maybe multiple orgasms are better (or dark chocolate--especially if it is smeared on a tasty man--which, of course, can lead to the MOs), but serious shopping is the next best thing. So when I heard about the new clothing line a certain tasty man has been building I just had to go buy a new dress.

When I saw it I knew I needed two! One in each color. The dress, by Bird of Prey, is called "Choir"--all slinky black with a gorgeous Celtic cross in scarlet or ivory on the mandarin-collared bodice, on panels of the prim skirt, and on the gauntlet-cuffed gloves. I'm wearing it here with my thigh-high black boots by DE Designs, and the Mata Hari bracelet by Random Calliope. The hair is "Amber" by Callico Creations, in both sunkissed and golden versions of blonde. You can find Bird of Prey shops in the vendor areas of Blue Noise and Bloodforge dance clubs.

Now all I need is a TP to the nearest "Best in Gothic" contest . . . So who wants to take me dancing?

Erotica: The Lap Dance

(Warning, X-rated post follows!)

I am thinking about you,
you know who you are...
I had this fantasy of you...
Do you want to hear it?

I have a vision of you leaning back in a chair...
and me wearing a little frou-frou skirt,
sexy back-laced bustier, tiny black thong...

Facing you, I dance...
wiggle for you...
I lean in, you watch me
slide over you, not quite touching...
teasing,
I run my hands over my breasts...
lick my finger...
slide it betwen my thighs...
offer it to you to suck....

I see the bulge in your pants...
what a lovely compliment....

I turn as if to sit in your lap, but...
not quite. I wiggle...
brushing my ass across your thighs...
I can feel your erection grow,
straining against those tight jeans....

I sit in your lap...
reach down and unzip you...
you untie my top and slide your hands
underneath,
over my breasts...
my nipples harden between your fingers...
as I pull aside my thong and slip
my wet pussy...
over your hot cock
and my hips begin to circle on you...

You rock into me...
thrusting...
pumping...
harder and faster, in and out...
fucking me...
until we explode together....

Are you thinking about me now?
What's your fantasy?

SL and RL: Where They Touch and Where They Collide

Funny thing about having a Second Life is that it can be so much like all the good parts of Real Life (tm) without the negatives. In both there can be dancing and sightseeing, sporting events, movies, books, concerts, there are good friends and good conversation, and there is flirting and romance and even sex.

But in SL there are no dishes to do, no laundry or cleaning, no house painting (unless you count building textures), and landscaping and repairs don't involve getting messy or dirty or tired or sore. No one has to make the bed. Taking out the trash is just a click of a button. In SL with the right partner there can be very good sex--even if it is in the form of mutual masturbation.

One of the most obvious things most people notice right away about SL is that, although it removes the bumps and discomforts of RL, it also has it's own brand of limitations. In SL I can fly, in RL I am afraid of heights; in SL I can breathe underwater, in RL I can't even swim; but in RL I am an excellent dancer, have been a professional bellydancer, in SL (and for me here is one of the disappointments of SL) I am frustrated by the limitations of what a script, a dance pole, or a poseball will let me do.

SL relationships also suffer from similar deprivations. The lovely folks at Xcite! and Strokerz have given us virtual genitalia, love animations, and sex toys. Those things, together with a sexually experienced partner who has good narrative skills, can be very stimulating, but there is one significant element missing. Human touch. The feel of your lover's hands running over your flesh. The touch of your lover's mouth on yours. The soft, salty taste of skin. The sweet hot pleasure of penetration. These are things that cannot be replaced by virtual games. Or can they?

Now there are people working on the technology to provide some of that. Believe it or not, this is a serious field of technology which is called "Teledildonics." Now you can buy a kissing phone that will give you a kiss matching the kiss of your lover on the other end. You can get a shirt that allows you to feel hugs from your distant partner. And (no shit!) there are electronic vaginas and penises through which you can stimulate each other to orgasm!

doubt that anything will ever replace the desire for real human touch, and I am sure most of us don't have the funds to invest in an arsenal of electronic devices. But there is a trend for relationships begun in SL to escalate to higher and higher levels, including spilling over to RL, and maybe this sort of electronic toy is the answer to keeping your RL and SL from overlapping or worse from colliding.

Now I am not saying you shouldn't mix SL with RL, that is of course a personal choice. The difficulty is making that choice reasonably and rationally, and--being human and fallible--if we aren't careful we can make choices that affect us or our RL loved ones badly.

The press is full of articles that bash Internet relationships. There was the story of the fellow who spends nearly 20 hours a day in SL neglecting his real wife for his SL wife. Even if you are single you can make choices that turn out badly, like the chick whose ex-online lover killed himself leaving her with no closure, or the one who is moving to the city of her Internet pal but fears becoming a homewrecker. And, when online lovers do meet, there is the issue of possibly spreading sexually transmitted diseases from meeting online partners for a quick tryst in RL.

What we never seem to hear about in the news are the many couples that meet online and then succeed in establishing solid RL relationships. I can think of a half dozen among my friends and acquaintances in SL alone. In an SL interview with Reuters SL News Center, Internet entrepreneur Arianna Huffington has even noted that:

A lot of people who want to explore different possibilities, they can now do it in Second Life instead of, say, leaving their wife—fulfilling some other fantasy. Why not experiment? I think Second Life will save marriages.

And she may be right. While many people push the online envelope into their real life, there are many more who are perfectly happy having their cake in SL and eating it in RL, too--taking the stimulation they feel by sex in SL back into improving their real live relationships and experiencing with their real partners that experimentation they have been able to explore online in a safe environment first.

So once again it all boils down to choices. Have SL sex? Why not. It is safe and it can be fun. Is it cheating if you are already RL married or committed?--only you (and your partners) can decide that. (Hell, I have one RL girlfriend who considers her BF looking at porn magazines a form of cheating.)

Should you meet that online partner in RL? Now you need to slow down and think it through. There are a whole lot of "what ifs" to consider. If you are committed in RL will it hurt that relationship? Maybe a Same Time Next Year scenerio will hurt neither of you, but what if one of you wants more and the other doesn't? What will you do if you don't like the real person as much as you do the avatar? If he/she finds you unattractive in RL? Or, worse, has lied about his/her real self? These are things to consider before you let that second life collide with your real one.

The bottom line is that there are many wonderful things about Second Life worth exploring and enjoying--especially safe virtual sex--without worrying about how much better it could be in RL. Maybe we need to take each for what it is worth. Enjoy RL for RL's sake, and enjoy SL for SL's sake. I can dance in SL for or with a partner and enjoy it for what it is--virtual communication. And I can dance in RL with or without a partner and enjoy it for the exercise of my talent as well as the potential for human touch. These worlds may touch for me someday if I find the right partner to dance with in both--and I do mean "dance," in the ballroom and in the bedroom, with a partner who I trust in both RL and SL.

On the other hand, unless it is right for both of us, these worlds may forever stay separate. It really doesn't matter as long as I make the choices wisely. In the meantime I intend to enjoy each venue for all it has to offer.

Online Love Life a Threat to Your Job?

My favorite s'expert, Regina Lynn of Wired.com's Sex Drive, discussed in "Teachers Should Blog, Tweet and Flirt Online Like the Rest of Us" a growing concern about limiting the online fantasy lives of teachers. She asks:

What would you do if your employer told you not to use MySpace, Match.com and Second Life because those sites are "too dangerous" and "inappropriate" for you?

If you're a teacher in Ohio, you'd better think twice before you answer, because it's not a hypothetical question. According to the Columbus Dispatch, the state's teacher's unions recommend that teachers not post profiles on social networking or online dating sites because it could lead to the appearance of improper relationships with students.

This hits close to home for me as both an educator and an American concerned with infringement of civil liberties. Note here the phrase: "appearance of improper relationships"--this skirts close to being accused and condemned for a sin you haven't committed yet. Now in Second Life I don't tend to advertise where I live or what and where I teach, and thankfully I don't expect to run into underage students there, but even the thought of censure for my online SL life is disconcerting. I have no intention of having "improper relationships," just a healthy and fulfilling fantasy sex life with other consenting virtual adults. Fortunately Lynn agrees and she goes on to say:

Social networking, online dating and even uploading a pornographic video of oneself to an adults-only online performance space has nothing to do with one's students and everything to do with one's personal life and sexuality. Holding teachers up to a "higher standard"--symbols of an "ideal purity" that the rest of us are relieved we don't have to attain--is not only impossible, it works against our goal of helping young people mature into responsible adults.

She further notes that knowing how such virtual social environments work is likely to be beneficial to educators who struggle to reach the current Internet generation.

All adults who work with youth should be aware of how young people communicate, fall in love and stay connected; I encourage teachers to try social networking services, to have a blog, to text message with their own families and friends. Experienced teachers will not only gain a better sense of the world their students live in--indeed, a world their students are creating--they will have a greater understanding of the young teachers entering the profession. . . . But teachers who understand appropriate relationships with students are not going to "friend" teens on MySpace, text message youth about their sex lives or hook up with minors in role-playing games.

I agree. As someone who has used blogging as a classroom activity and even discussed appropriate Internet etiquette with students, I can see only good in a teacher being hip to the latest in online social spaces. Back in April, Lynn wrote an article dealing with similar issues, about online activity and RL workplace perceptions, "Sex and Nudity Aren't Good Reasons to Fire Someone", in which she asks:

What if we start with the idea that sex is good, bodies are beautiful and exhibitionism is a wonderfully exuberant way to celebrate life, love and the pursuit of pleasure?

What if we take it a step further and admit that technology has opened the doors--and the windows, and the portcullises, and the skylights and the ventilation systems--to a surfeit of sexual expression and display?

Is it really asking too much to suggest that employers stop worrying about how we perform in adult spaces and concentrate on how we perform our jobs instead?

And therein lies the crux of the issue. If your online activities impact your job negatively, then maybe you need to rethink your approach to the games you play. Or even the time you spend playing online. Lynn is righteously annoyed by the puritanical attitude that sees a virtual sex life as abnormal:

I am so sick of the priggishness. Tired of people making assumptions about a person based on their perceptions of the other's sexuality -- especially when they base those assumptions on the single dimension of online expression. Flabbergasted at the assumption that if you participate in adult activity online, you must lack judgment, integrity or reliability.

Getting naked on the internet is an international pastime, not the whim of a handful of sex addicts. Flashing your booty or treating yourself to an orgasm is hardly a sign that you are incapable of doing your job well, nor does it grant permission for others to dismiss your professional competence or authority.

We assume that everyone has RL relationships. No one is faulted for having sexual partners in RL, so why should virtual partners be any different? The key is, as with most things, using your common sense. You don't tell your boss or your customers (or your students if you are a teacher) about what you do in bed with your RL lovers, so why wouldn't you be just as discreet about your SL relationships? Just like in RL, where if you need to talk about your love life you cultivate a friend or confidante in whom you can confide, you can also find someone you can talk to about your online activities. Again, be discreet. Bear in mind that though there are always going to be people who will look for flaws in your behavior, there are also those who will understand (despite the media attention to illegal or dangerous internet activities involving sex) that this is just your own outlet for fantasy or healthy sexual recreation.

Balancing a home life, a work life, and a healthy online sex life is not easy, and it is important not to get so caught up in the virtual game that it spills into and consumes your real life. Or at least you need to be aware of and be prepared to deal with the flack that can cause. But the rewards of a virtual sex life's impact on your real sex life is also there. In the end it is who we love, and that we love, not how we love that really matters.

Quotes du Jour: Woody Allen on Sex

It's a slow day for a Friday, so just in case you all were taking me (or yourselves) too seriously here are a bunch of Woody Allen quotes regarding sex.

Is sex dirty? Only if it's done right.

Love is the answer--but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions..

Sex between 2 people is a beautiful thing. Between 5, it's fantastic.

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
Sex between a man and a woman can be absolutely wonderful--provided you get between the right man and the right woman.

On bisexuality: It immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers.

My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty.

I'm such a good lover because I practise a lot on my ownDon't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love.

Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously.

I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.

She Comes First: Oral Sex Tips for Men

The article below, "She Comes First," was posted on AskMen.Com as part of their guest authors weekly features. I stumbled across it this morning and decided it was worth sharing with all you Second Life Lovers who may be wondering how to describe your oral sex technique to your girl, or how to tell your guy what you want. I can say from experience that any man who can do this, in real or virtual sex, is worth hanging on to. Just reading this made me hot, made me think about the men I love, and got my juices flowing. <wink> So read on, gentlemen, and be sure to use these tips next time you go down on your lady whether in SL or in RL.

*******************************************************

In this excerpt from She Comes First, author Ian Kerner stresses the importance of the first few touches when it comes to pleasing your lady, and how a good "first impression" will dictate how the rest of the oral sex session goes.

The approach
Never underestimate the power of first impressions, especially the impression of your lips against her vulva. This first kiss atop a woman's vulva is often the most exquisite of all possible kisses and can literally take her breath away.Approach the first kiss as an event, as though tasting the first sip of an expensive bottle of wine that you've been saving for that special occasion. Don't just pop off the cork and start swigging: Let it breathe, sniff and savor the bouquet, admire the body, note the complexion and tone, and then, finally, take that much-anticipated first sip. Allow yourself to appreciate the full experience.

Run your fingers gently through her pubic hair.

Be sure to tease her amply. Kiss her softly on the inner thigh, as well as the smooth skin adjoining her vulva. Kiss her with little, succulent smacks (lips pursed, no tongue) on her inner and outer lips, or even on the top of the head. Make sure that your first kiss is less about direct contact with the clitoris and more about appreciating the entire genital area.
Breathe hotly on her vulva.

Blow, ever so gently, on her clitoral head.

If she's still wearing her panties, kiss her through them. Then delicately peel them to the side to reveal the glistening wet vulva.
Caution: Never, under any circumstances, blow into a woman's vagina as though trying to fill it with air. Doing so is seriously dangerous. Blowing into a woman's vagina may cause an embolism and lead to death. Breathe on her; blow lightly on her; never blow into her.

The moment before
Before you move in for the first kiss, take a moment to acknowledge the presence of the vulva: your partner in pleasure. Prepare yourself mentally for the experience ahead. Remind yourself that you are there to lead her steadfastly through the process of sexual response to orgasm.

And now it's time for the kiss...

This is a great time to remind her of the Three Assurances:

• Going down on her turns you on; you enjoy it as much as she does.
• There's no rush; she has all the time in the world. You want to savor every moment.
• Her scent is provocative, her taste powerful: It all emanates from the same beautiful essence.

Like a guest arriving at a much-anticipated dinner party, let your hostess know how excited you are to be there, how beautiful she looks, and how much you're looking forward to the meal ahead. Put her at ease.Tease her, taunt her, tantalize--make her think she's not ever going to get it, ever, and then, just when she's on the brink of utter madness, give it to her.

The kiss
Make your first lick a slow and tender "ice cream" lick from bottom to top. Make it long and lasting. Take it all in.

Start at the base of her vaginal entrance, the fourchette, and work your way up.

Take in the full length of her labia minora (inner lips) and let your tongue rest briefly against her frenulum, the area just under the clitoral head.

As you go over the head, brush it lightly as a feather, and then proceed to her front commissure (the area just above the head).

Push down on her front commissure with the tip of your tongue and feel the sinewy clitoral shaft beneath it.

As you kiss her slowly from top to bottom, press your finger lightly against her perineum (the expanse of skin just below her vaginal entrance).

When you lick the full span of her vaginal entrance, place your hand atop her mons pubis and nudge it gently toward her abdomen. This will stretch the skin and tighten her vaginal entrance, enabling you to lushly encompass her sensitive inner labia as you lick.

As an alternative to the standard position, grab hold of her upper thighs prior to the first kiss and pivot her legs up into the air so that only her butt is touching the bed and her vulva is completely exposed.

No matter what your approach, take it long and slow, from bottom to top, and savor every step of the journey. Now that you've lavished her with the first kiss (that long full lick), let your tongue rest flat against the length of her vaginal entrance. Encompass her vulva with your tongue. Take a moment to let the experience of the first kiss resonate.

Make sure it's love at first lick.

Shaking Booty at Blue Noise

So it's Saturday night and I am back shaking it in Blue Noise. The best thing about this club is really the people who work here. First there is Rhi, who manages the place, she's gorgeous and witty and has the fellows lining up. Then there are Kat, Roj, Doc, and Nerdi, who host the club's many and various contests. Among the female dancers there is me, of course, and Cordy, Sky, Bobbi, Savannah, Lucy, Harley, Envy, Jinara, Zoya, Sandrene, Lucy, Sandra, and many more. Some of these dancers double as escorts as well and can show you the fun places in Blue Noise's Sister Club, Blue Noise Hideaway. There are male dancers, too, including Jamien, Jara, Konstantine, and Nerdi, as well as several others. The DJs: MC, Patrick, Clinton, and the Radio Trauma gang, are wonderful, and love to take requests.

But the best thing about Blue Noise is that there is a camaraderie among the dancers, escorts, and the staff that is dynamic. On any given night there may be a only few, to a handful, to a crowd of patrons in BN, all having fun on the floor. You might be stalked by a sassy Aussie, or offered a Tesla coil by a savvy fox, or invited by a hot west coast lesbian to join a conga line and strip. Unlike other clubs where there are price guidelines for clothing coming off, the BN bunch is always ready to get naked--usually this is encouraged by one particular bad boy dancer who will challenge the ladies to match him clothing piece by clothing piece. By the end of any night you will find half the patrons naked as well! Expect an offer to go home with our favorite stripper fella to try out his latest set of orgy balls.

On costume contest nights you might find a mermaid in the pool, a sexy dragon on the dance floor, or a hot dancer in fairy wings who has more particle machines than most of SL. Then there's the schoolgirl types,: one in bobbysocks who will stun you with her athletic abilities and another in pink pigtails who can tease a man to orgasm in IM without ever leaving the dancepole. The conversation can ranges from surfing to Shakespeare, from London to Lisbon to L.A., from fav TV shows, to particle physics, to Preraphaelite art, to sexual techniques. A little something for everyone, and never boring.

If you are a Blue Noise VIP you probably know who all I am talking about here, if you are not . . . well c'mon up and see me sometime and I'll introduce you around. . . .

Narrating the Sensual Senses

In RL we are bombarded daily with sensations: sound, sight, smell, taste, touch. In SL we are a bit more limited. All we have is the visual (our avatars and animations) and verbal (chat and IM) for expressing ourselves--although happily that verbal is sometimes now audio (the second life voice viewer is live) as well as text. But without the sensation of touch, the ability to run fingertips over skin, to let lips connect, to feel the pleasure of orgasm and ejaculation, how can sex in SL be as gratifying as that in real life? For some it can't. For those, however, who are willing to let their imaginations go, there is a a remarkable wealth of sensations that can be described and thus imagined along with the physical release that comes from the mutual masturbation that accompanies SL sex.

Think about it. Some of the most remarkable pleasures of a sexual relationship are not in the end product: orgasm, but rather are those small things that trigger imagination and desire. The warmth and strength of a holding lover's hand in yours carries with it the memory every hand that you have ever held, from the security of the parent's hand when you were a child to that first daring time you touched a member of the opposite sex, to the fingers of the most desired lover you can't forget. When you describe twining your fingers with those of your SL partner--describe the way your fingers slide into his, describe feeling the strength of his hand that could crush yours yet holds you with a touch as light as a butterfly--you evoke the memories he carries as well as your own. We connect best in SL when those memory patterns overlap, when both partners have the same sort of pleasurable memories to draw on. Another way of saying this is that you must be willing or able to connect on some inner levels with your partner. Know what he likes and dislikes.

Take scents for instance. Scents are remarkable triggers of memory. Lavender always reminds me of my grandmother, pleasant memories, but not conducive to romance. Jasmine, however, makes me feel sexy, exotic. I can trigger either scent in my own brain by its description, by merely naming it. No olfactory stimulation necessary. So if I tell my lover that I love the way he smells, like cinnamon and deep woods, and when I tell him that if he buries his face in my hair I will smell of oranges and jasmine, I am triggering my own memories of certain sexy men's colognes, of cooking in a kitchen with a lover, and of my own sexual identity.

He, too, has to on some level, think of those as sexy agreeable scents and also be able to imagine them. If he has never smelled jasmine he might be able to as least conjure an image of flowers and connect that to a romantic moment. But if cinnamon reminds him of pumpkin pie and Christmas and family things, that might not be the frame of reference I want to evoke for a truly lusty encounter. The important thing is to listen to what your lover is saying, pay attention to how he responds to your descriptive moments in IM or voice. Don't get so carried away by your own narrative that you forget to listen to what he is saying and especially what he is responding to!

If you can flesh out the narrative, clearly describing what the sights, scents, tastes, and touches are of your lovemaking, and encourage (by example) your partner to do the same . . . SL sex can be as good as (even if different from) RL sex.

Tsai's life goes off on a Tangent

I am not even sure where I was when I met him. It has been only a week or so, and it feels like centuries. Time in SL messes you up like that. I was on a quest for the perfect pair of sexy shoes. You know all strappy and sparkly. And when I walked out of the store, there he was. Standing in the middle of the street, looking all dark and broody. Black hair in a ponytail, long wisps of it falling in his face. Dark glasses, black jacket. The kind of man your mother tells you to stay away from. A dark bird of prey. Dangerous. Desirable.

I wanted to try out my newest sexy walk so I strutted past him. Let him see my ass. That usually does the trick. I was expecting a wolf howl, or a raunchy comment. Was thinking, why don’t I get clients who look like that? Then he stopped me. Of all the unexpected things he could say, he asked the origins of my name. I told him that I’d tell him about mine if he’d tell me about his. We went to Mystic’s Club. (I highly recommend Slow Dance 4!) We danced. I have been dancing ever since.

There is something about this mystery man. He is an enigma—even for SL. Scary desires. The hands of an artist. The silver-tongue of a poet. "Verbal foreplay" he calls it and he is not wrong. Let me tell you, the give and take of teasing and flirting, the fencing with innuendo, and the right balance of sexy talk and promise—this is a fine art. Here’s the thing guys, most women know that the art of lovemaking lies not just in the look, but also in the words. You can be the hunkiest of hunks and if your dialogue is consistently "hey, I wanna f*** you!" you will not be getting flocks of hot women rushing to lie down for you.

It is easy for women to pick up most men. Men love to hear us talk sexy. But rare is the man who can keep us on our toes. Who can keep up his half of the dialogue, and mean it. I have met scores of men in SL... only a handful were truly good at SL flirting. One hot geek, one sexy Brit, and this man, my mystery lover.

Don’t know where this is going, don’t know how long it will last. Don’t care. I’ll fly this bird as long as he will return. No jesses, no hood. And if the talons he has hooked into my heart are occasionally scary—well, life is not...love is not... for sissies.